Adelante, Tierra

"Los años pasan, nos estamos poniendo viejos..." Pablo Milanés.

Pregunto ¿viejos o sabios? Does the changing of the years change us too? What do we leave behind and what do we look forward to and why are we happy about this? ¿Por qué celebramos este cambio si quiere decir que estamos más cerca de nuestro fin? ¿Soy o no soy la misma persona que ayer? ¿Mañana seré distinta?

A veces los sentimientos se ponen fuertes durante estos cambios; es hora de despedirse al pasado y saludar el año nuevo lleno de esperanza. Next year everything will be better. Next year I'll be rich. Next year I'll find my true love. Next year the world will see me for who I really am. Next year.....next year.....NEXT YEAR.

What about NOW I ask? "Next year" no existe....solamente tenemos el "ahora." Y la Tierra que gira y sigue girando nada más tiene este momento y este momento y este momento.

Just the other day we had our "first snow" of the season. We call this night "First Night" but it's really the last night, isn't it? This year ends and another one begins, one door closes and another door opens, el sol desaparece y la luna aparece....y todo sigue adelante,

adelante,

adelante...y sigo yo y seguimos todos...¿qué más podemos hacer? Mañana voy a aprender algo nuevo, mañana algo inesperado y maravilloso me va a pasar, mañana seré más conciente, tomorrow wonderful things will happen, but hey, the truth of the matter is that "tomorrow" never comes, so all those things must happen in the Now and then I will talk about them as past events. So where do I really exist? Maybe a better question is Do I exist? Just because I think I do doesn't necessarily mean that's the truth. Okay, this is going too far. Cállate, Lorena y di "Feliz Año Nuevo."

Happy New Year!!! A todos mis amigos en todos lados.

I shall cry happy tears, happy tears to be alive and watch this year melt into another.

Soy Lorena
12/31/06

Tengo una pregunta

If you look closely you can see the face in the clouds. I snapped this photo one morning when the clouds were streaming by in unique patterns; only later I noticed the face. If you back away a little, it is easier to see.

So, I've been thinking....he estado pensando sobre la Regla de Oro, the Golden Rule. Todas las religiones tienen una version de esta regla. Yes, amazing, they all have this rule in one form or another.

Christianity--All things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye so to them; for this is the law and the prophets.
Cristianismo--En todas las cosas, trata a otros como tú quisieras ser tratado, porque esta es la ley y los profetas.
Buddhism--Hurt not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful.
Budismo--No trates a otros de maneras que tú mismo encontrarías hirientes.
Hinduism--This is the sum of duty; do naught onto others what you would not have them do unto you.
Induismo--Esta es la suma del deber; no hagas a otros lo que te causaría dolor si te fuese hecho a ti.
Judaism--What is hateful to you, do not do to your fellowman. This is the entire Law; all the rest is commentary.
Judaismo--Lo que es odioso para ti, no se lo hagas a tu vecino. Esto es la totalidad del Torá; todo lo demás es comentario.
Islam--No one of you is a believer until he desires for his brother that which he desires for himself.
Islamismo--Ninguno de ustedes cree verdaderamente hasta que quieran para otros lo que desean para ustedes mismos.
Taoism--Regard your neighbor's gain as your gain, and your neighbor's loss as your own loss.
Taoismo--Considera como tuyas las ganancias de tu prójimo y sus pérdidas como las tuyas propias.
Unitarianism--We affirm and promote respect for the web of interdependence of all existence of which we are a part.
Unitarianismo--Afirmamos y promovemos el respeto por la red de interdependencia entre toda existencia de la cual somos parte.

Mi pregunta es, my question is: Tomando en cuenta toda la gente que pertenece a una religion u otra, so many people claim to belong to one religion or another and each religion has this rule, how is it possible, ¿cómo es posible que hay guerra, hay tortura, hay asesinos? How can we harm others and justify this action? Are we all hypocrites?

How can I torture you if I don't want to be tortured? Have I no feeling for another human being that I can do this horrific deed? Where is my conscience, my awareness of what is right and what is wrong? Can we commit a crime and not be punished? By harming another, do we bring about our own downfall?

I'm sorry I don't have answers for these questions, but I think they are questions worth pondering. Maybe there is an answer somewhere. Quién sabe.

De todos modos creo en el valor del ser humano y sé que hay más bondad que maldad en este mundo. I do believe in the goodness of Humanity.

May we always treat each other with kindness and respect.

Soy Lorena.
12/29/06

Twilight

It's twilight and half a moon appears with her corona de luz, reflejo del sol. Los árboles se quedan en el crepúsculo desnudos contra el frío, desnudos durante todo el invierno, desnudos pero tranquilos a la vez.

I watch as the blue of the day sky fades into the blackness of the night sky and the moon gets brighter and brighter holding the warmth from the sun.

She smiles at me, my luna, mi amor while she smiles at someone else halfway around the world. It is the same moon even though she may be upside down to some. She is always beautiful mi luna, siempre bella aunque sea pequeña o llena, brillante o borrosa......and well, aren't we similar in a way?

Are we only beautiful when we are young? What is beauty anyway? I think real beauty comes from the soul, the body being simply the outer shell that grows and changes with the seasons. Someone once told me "it doesn't matter what you look like, that's not the important thing." If you are beautiful inside that beauty will shine through to the outside and the world will see it.

Como los árboles, son bellos con sus hojas verdes, son bellos con sus hojas de colores y son bellos sin sus hojas, con sus ramas pelonas. Y allí están, altos, firmes, fijos mirando pasar este invierno esperando que venga la primavera para provocar la belleza de sus hojas nuevas.

Let us be like the trees, strong, constant, beautiful in spite of the weather just waiting to bloom again when the soft breezes blow us into Spring.

Happy winter.

Soy Lorena
12/28/06

It's just another day

In the scheme of things Christmas is just another day. It is we who give it special meaning, it is we who mark the passing of time, it is we who hope each moment will be better than the last. Our hopes and our wishes count for something though, they do, especially when they are all combined together to create a more powerful wish for good things to happen.

¿Qué quieres para la Navidad? What do you want for Christmas? Asistimos al servicio de la Nochebuena anoche en mi iglesia y estuvo más espiritual que nunca para mí. Nuestro pastor leyó un poema sobre eso, what do you want for Christmas. I can't remember all the things that were mentioned, but I know they were not material and I can think of some things along the lines of those mentioned.

I want a clean heart that expresses only kindness.
Quiero que mis palabras siempre salgan de un lugar de amor.
Quiero recordar dar las gracias todos los días por lo que me da el Universo.
I want peace to spread in the world like dominos falling in a line.
Quiero tener la capacidad de perdonar y comprender a los demás.
Quiero amar y dejarme amar.
I want always to be amazed by Life.
I want to never stop learning.
Quiero que todos mis amigos y mis queridos sean felices.

In fact, I wish that curiosity, hope, optimism, zest, enthusiasm, tolerance, interest in the world, forgiveness and mercy will be here always for us to have and use as we are able.

And then there's honesty and open-mindedness.....so many beautiful qualities in the world we can embrace if we so choose.

Entonces, digo hay que dejar que este día sea especial con deseos no materiales, sino más profundos, espirituales y así llegamos a un mundo mejor, tal vez un mundo de paz. ¿Cuántos años hemos pedido paz en la Tierra? Pues, creo que está pasando, paso a paso, pero sí hay cambios buenos en esta Tierra. Keep your eyes open, look for them and you will find them.

What do you want for Christmas?

May all your wishes come true.

Soy Lorena.
12/25/06

Oops!

Lo siento....I don't know what I was thinking yesterday when I said that the winter solstice meant equal day and equal night. Yikes. I must have been thinking about the Equinoxes.
So, this is a correction. The winter solstice, el solsticio del invierno quiere decir que el día, o sea, la luz del día es la más corta, the shortest day, and we experience the longest night or darkness.

Metaphorically speaking, what does it all mean? The shortest day, the longest night? Hibernation. Hibernación. That's what we should be doing, hibernating, like the chipmunks and the bears. Well, I don't mean literally go to sleep for the winter, just slow down if you will, take time to really look at the sky, the earth as it changes, the sun, the moon (Where is she these days?) El cuerpo necesita un descanso también y el frío es buena oportunidad de hacer todo un poquito más tranquilo. No ha nevado todavía, los días han estado preciosos, el clima no tempestuoso para nada........así que hay que disfrutar estos días cortos y estas noches largas porque ahora la Tierra empieza su cambio alargando los días y acortando las noches.

I went out again to see the sun rise and this time the sky was clear and the sun rose in perfect alignment between the two boulders as I stood on the flat rock across the field. Some ancient indigenous peoples knew all about the earth's movements and created this look-out point or healing sacred rock for all I know. It was like looking back into the past and present at the same time. So I uploaded the photo I took just an hour and a half ago. Ah, technology. Para que tuvieran una idea. You get the idea, it was an amazing moment....and right here within walking distance from my house.

My apologies for yesterday's mistake.

Have a great day.

Soy Lorena
12/22/06

Winter Solstice

El solsticio del invierno....when the day is the same length as the night. This is a time when we should be in perfect balance. But are we? No hubo sol en la mañana, la nubes taparon todo y no salió mi sol hasta la tarde, ay, pero qué tarde, qué sol y qué puesta del sol (exclamation point here). El cielo tenía nubes que estallaban en "llamas" teñidas de un color tan inusitado que no encuentro nombre. ¿Color albaricoque? ¿Chabacano? ¿Anaranjado-durazno? Peach, apricot, orange, flaming orange........I don't know, maybe it was its own special color without name, sans nom, sin nombre...heaven's color. There was so much to see, to absorb, and then night fell as it tends to do.
And that was the day. It began in darkness and ended in darkness and what I want to know is, was I there? Am I here? Where is here? ¿Dónde está aquí? Si hago caso a mi mente, pues, estoy en México, pero mi cuerpo está acá en Nueva Inglaterra, este terreno frío. In my dreams during the night I am in "fantasy land." ¿Verdad? Where is the dream world? Where is cyberspace? I have heard we exist in several dimensions at the same time. Well, now I'm beginning to believe it. My head, my dreams, my words in cyberspace, my body can all be in different places at the same time. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh(signo de admiración).

Well, I was intending to talk about something else, heh, heh, but you know how it is, I never know what I'm going to say until I say it. ;-)

So.....hoy es el solsticio y me acordé de un cuento para niños acerca de un ratón llamado Federico que en vez de guardar comida para el invierno, él guarda los colores. Los otros ratones lo regañan porque para ellos Federico es perezoso, no trabaja. Pasa el tiempo y llega el invierno. Al principio todos están contentos comiendo la comida que tenían guardada, pero después se acaba la comida y los días se ponen grises y fríos y los ratones empiezan a deprimirse. Entonces, Federico saca sus colores y los comparte con todos los ratones y todos se animan y así aguantan el resto del invierno.

So the moral of the story is that every job is as important as every other job. We need artists as well as doctors, dancers and bankers, musicians and carpenters, hotel administrators and insurance salespeople, waiters and actors, usually waiter/actor combo. We all have a place in this universe.

That's what I was thinking about on this winter solstice day.

Feliz solsticio. Happy Solstice.

Soy Lorena
12/21/06

Assumptions

No supongas, suponer te hace inventar historias...y después creerlas y traen sufrimiento. Don Miguel tells us not to make assumptions, but oh, my god, how easy we do it and don't even realize it most of the time.

I'm looking for my daughter. I call her telephone number, the phone rings and rings, no one answers, no answering machine, nothing. She is not there, (I assume). No está, y me preocupo dónde estará a estas horas. Dejo mensajes en su celular pero no me llama. I go to bed with an uneasy mind. Where is she? Where is she? ¿Dónde andará? No quiero pero me imagino que fue sequestrada y no puede comunicarse con nadie. En seguida me digo que esto es ridículo. No, she hasn't been kidnapped, but she is alone. Her boyfriend is out of the country for ten days and she's on her own. Before I sleep I ask the Universe for help, pido sosiego. Durante la noche sueño con ella, estamos hablando por teléfono un buen rato y todo está bien, me tranquilizo. La luz del día me ayuda ver todo de otro color. I wake up calmer, not worrying. Somehow I think all is well.

I call her cell phone. She picks up. "Hi, mom. What's up?"

"Where are you?"

"Driving back to town."

"I tried to call you but there was no answer. It just rang and rang."

"Oh, my phone is dead. I don't know what's wrong with it. I have no dial tone."

Assumptions. ¿Por qué pensamos o suponemos lo peor? I didn't think of a dead phone.

Este es otro ejemplo de cuando rompemos uno de los acuerdos, sufrimos a consecuencia de hacerlo. How to be aware of the potential of making assumptions before we make them, that's the challenge.

More on the Four Agreements to come......y mi lucha personal con ellos.

Assumptions have about as much substance as those clouds I enjoyed from the window of the airplane.

Soy Lorena
12/19/06

The Power of Dreams

I'm not talking about daydreams, soñar despierto, I'm talking about those night visitors, our crazy, illogical, out of sequence, time clashing erratic scenes from our unconscious that invade our sleeping minds when we think we're resting. Hah! Some rest...monkey-mind never stops, even in our sleep. Pero tienen un poder increíble también, nos dan consejos, nos dicen el futuro, nos explican cosas del pasado....un momento, did I say they tell us the future?

Uh, well, yes I did, actually. You want proof? ¿Una prueba? Okay, when I was twelve I dreamed I was with a girlfriend and nearby was a boy talking to some friends. He had black hair, was not tall and he was Spanish speaking, sí, hispanohablante. Yo, en ese entonces no hablaba español. I turned to my girlfriend and said, "That's the man I'm going to marry." Diez años después me casé con Rafael who fit the description of the boy in my dream.

A more powerful dream me llegó sobre un amigo mexicano. Lo soñe en el año 83 creo. I think I dreamed it in 1983 or thereabouts. Anyway, mi amigo, Alfredo y yo estamos caminando en Nueva York, una ciudad que él amaba y conocía bien. Pasamos por muchos barrios, hablando con gente y todo, pero queremos llegar a un destino no me acuerdo dónde. So, we are walking and walking through the streets of New York. Suddenly, Alfredo crosses a bridge and a giant steel wall comes down and separates me from him. Maybe it's more like a door. Esta puerta de acero cae fuerte y no hay paso para mí. Grito, llamo a Alfredo, pero no puedo pasar y él no puede regresar. I'm desperate that he can't come back and I can't reach him.

Six years later Alfredo was killed by a car while crossing a street in New York. Fue matado por un coche que corría a toda velocidad.

Lo más extraño de los sueños para mí es que me acordaba siempre de los sueños toda la vida hasta llegar a los principios de los años 90. Desde entonces, no me acuerdo casi nada de mis sueños.......how strange. My day life changed, big time and my night life seemed to disappear.

What do your dreams tell you? ¿Qué te dicen tus sueños? ¿Te aconsejan? ¿Te dicen el futuro?

It's all very interesting, this life we are living, these dreams we are dreaming.

Soy Lorena
12/18/06

Are you lost?

¿Estás perdido? Is this what I meant? Oh, these languages can be so confusing at times. If I am lost in my language, it can mean that I am not familiar with my surroundings or it can mean that I am a "lost soul." But it's clearer en español. "Estoy perdida" y "Soy perdida" son dos cosas distintas. Por ejemplo, estoy caminando en el bosque cuando de repente no veo bien el camino de regreso, doy vueltas y digo "estoy perdida." Prefiero estar perdida que ser perdida. ¿Por qué? Si estoy perdida, pues, puedo morirme en el bosque si no encuentro la salida y nadie me rescata, y si soy perdida, bueno, sigo viviendo la vida mala pero estoy viva. Okay, I admit, this is crazy, but it's something to think about. Hay otro punto de vista que describe este poeta:

"Wherever you are is called Here.
And you must treat it as a powerful stranger.
The forest knows where you are.
You must let it find you." (David Wagoner)

When do you feel lost? Para nosotros los Baby Boomers, nos sentimos perdidos tal vez cuando tenemos que hacer algo nuevo con nuestras computadoras, o cuando viajamos por el mundo y hay máquinas en vez de personas para ayudarnos comprar boletos, etc. My father once said to me before his mind began to fail that the world was changing too much, that he couldn't understand the world anymore. Sometimes I feel that way, but I am still HERE and I don't have much choice about how the world is changing. I am forced to upgrade. Learn the lingo, get on board, don't get left behind. ¿Por qué mi nieto sabe más que yo sobre este mundo cuando he vivido más que él? ¿Me estoy poniendo vieja? I need to get with the program.

Perhaps I must "let the world find me." How to do that may take some time and meditation. Well, what else am I doing here besides eating, sleeping, working, cleaning the house and making love? I suppose I'm trying to figure it all out....get it right, I used to say. Will I ever get it right? ¿Qué quiere decir get it right? I'm not even sure how to say that in Spanish. Hacerlo bien, quizá. Creo que me falta vivir más vidas....me falta mucho, todavía, pero aquí estoy haciendo lo máximo que puedo en esta vida, es todo lo que puedo hacer, just do my best and hope for the best.

So, am I lost? Perhaps, perhaps we are all lost or perhaps we are all here, wherever that is.

Anyway, this earth is holding us and the earth knows where we are. That must be a comfort.

Soy Lorena.
12/16/06

In the Middle of a Cloud

I'm in the middle of a cloud this morning. I feel its freshness all around me and I keep on dancing. I'm in the middle of the morning as the sun is coming up and the sliver of a moon shines down upon me. El cielo cambia rápido de un color medio gris a un azul divino y me alegra mientras la luz de la luna se desvanece. I'm in the middle of the day.

The earth is turning faster these days, time has speeded up somehow and I feel like I'm on a treadmill running just to stay in place. But everything seems to get done. Duermo, me levanto, como, doy mis clases, los días acaban....y escucho al silencio también.

Regresemos a la Felicidad. ¿Existe? Let's get back to that elusive mischievous monkey-like mood called Happiness. Is it a state of being? Can you choose it or does it choose you? Jonathan Haidt says that voluntary activities make you happy. (Not volunteer activities, although doing volunteer work can bring happiness I think). What are voluntary activities? Those things you do when you don't have to do anything....down time, períodos de descanso. ¿Cómo llenas esos momentos? Los momentos cuando todo esté hecho, en su lugar y puedes hacer otra cosa. ¿Qué haces? Son esas actividades precisamente que traen la Felicidad....¿cierto, o no? Para mí, los momentos más felices son los momentos cuando estoy conmigo misma, sola, creando algo, escribiendo, componiendo, pensando, comunicándome con el silencio en la vida. Mi felicidad no depende de nadie realmente. Puedo estar feliz si estoy con amigos, pero no depende de ellos. Otros momentos felices existen cuando hay comunicación profunda con otra persona y nos entendemos bien, conversaciones que siguen y llegan a un punto significante. Me gusta tener una conversación profunda sin interrupciones, (difícil hoy en día, ya sé, pero posible por correo electrónico si los dos continuan el hilo sin dejar mucho tiempo pasar). Pero si uno deja caer la "pelota" y no la recoge en seguida, pues el otro pierde el ritmo, después pierde las ganas y después se le olvida el tema y se mete en otra onda y después se molesta y después trata de no enojarse pero es difícil y después empieza a imaginar muchas cosas que seguramente son mentiras, y después ya no quiere saber nada del otro....y después se arrepienta por pensar así y trata de comprender la razón por lo cual el otro no ha respondido, y por fin termina pensando ya ni modo, así es la vida, qué se puede hacer.

La verdad, esto no trae la felicidad....pero, un momento, por favor. La verdadera felicidad no depende de lo que hace las otras personas. Puede ser que a mí no me gusta lo que hace o no hace una persona pero eso no tiene que afectar mi estado de felicidad.

This theme needs to be continued but at a different time. I think I've had enough of it for one day.

Hasta luego.

Soy Lorena
12/14/06

La Vida Cotidiana

Es difícil no dejar que la vida cotidiana interrumpa tu conexión a la belleza del Universo. Llamadas importantes, papeles que mandar, preparar las lecciones, revisar el correo electrónico, buscar algo en el internet....wait a minute. There is a beautiful sky outside and the sun just came out. It's warmer today than yesterday and they are cutting down trees at the end of my driveway. Las nubes están muy lindas hoy, grandes, esponjosas invitándome a acostarme en ellas.

It's all about balance, isn't it? How to balance the mundane boring activities we absolutely must do with absorbing the beauty and the wonder in this world. How do you check your email and visit with Nature? Check your email and walk in the woods? Check your email and talk to the trees? Or do you check your email and CHECK YOUR EMAIL?

I noticed the ground this morning was especially interesting...I don't know why, tal vez por el color luminoso por la luz de la luna que todavía estaba afuera brillando sobre el laberinto. Cuando fui al buzón salió un conejo de la nada, me cruzó el camino, lo seguí hacía la casa, corría por la entrada, the driveway, bien rápido andaba pero se desapareció tan pronto que apareció. Brown and white bunny. It's details like this that make my day.

So here I am making telephone calls, doing my finances, checking my email, going on the internet, sending messages, receiving messages, making copies of pieces of paper to send to faraway places. Pero también estuve afuera gozando el día, inhalando el aire, dando las gracias al Universo, corriendo en el pasto, apreciando todo.

¿Cómo vivimos sin estos aparatos, la computadora? Ya no se puede. Un día me senté en frente de mi "computa" y no tenía internet. Por unos momentos no sabía que hacer, me sentía totalmente desconectada y eso se sentía raro, como si saliera de la casa y ya no estuviera nada de costumbre, nada de árboles, nada de cielo, nada del pasto. ¿Qué haría yo si eso pasara? Quién sabe, por eso digo que es importante el equilibrio en la vida. Balance.....a little of this, a little of that, not too much.

I think I'll go check my email, maybe the answer I'm waiting for will be there, or maybe not. Either way I'll go outside and hug a tree or something...just so I won't be out of balance. Fuera de equilíbrio.

May you have a balanced day.

I'm sure something unexpected and wonderful will happen.

Soy Lorena
12/12/06

Short days and long nights

Diciembre...el mes oscuro, the darkest month of the year, pero cuando hay sol, es inolvidable, los días fríos con una luz que calienta el alma...yes, well, winter has hit us here in New England, all of a sudden too. We were so lucky this November with warm days, balmy breezes and a sky that called out to be noticed, looked at and savored. Ahora hemos llegado al Invierno con mayúscula, un invierno que no bromea, un viento que te llega hasta los huesos, un frío empeñado. Pues sí, así es y te acepto Señor Invierno, acepto todo lo que me vas a dar de hoy en adelante and I'll deal, yes I'll deal with the cold, I'll deal with the wind and I'll deal with the snow that is sure to come.

One way I'll deal with Winter is to get out of here...plans to go somewhere warm, the Yucatan looks good right about now. Vamos a ver.

Pero en realidad soy parte de todo esto, parte del otoño, parte del invierno, parte de este país y parte de México (dónde siempre dejo mi corazón). Sé que soy madre y soy abuela, pero también soy una hija y estando en mi tierra natal por un momento es como convertirme otra vez en una niña de ocho o diez años y quiero que alguien me cuide. En Florida me siento joven, frágil, demasiado sentida, llorando sobre la tumba de mi mamá. Acá en Massachusetts soy madura, fuerte, responsable, apoyando a mis hijas, and I give a lot of myself to others, especially when I teach. Qué curioso, qué extraño es el ser humano. Cada uno tenemos tantos niveles, layers and layers of emotions.

So we accept what is and deal with our emotions, however they come, whatever they give us there is something to learn and I'm always learning.

"Are you the same person who was here twenty years ago?" I asked.

"We are not the same person, we are always changing," he answered.

"Well, do you have the same name?" I then asked.

"Yes."

"Oh." Noté su pelo canoso que antes era castaño.

It was a funny conversation but very appropriate for the Gargoyle shop.

Una tienda singular, muy rara decía Yoly. Sí, de acuerdo, rara pero divertida.

Quizá así es la Vida....rara pero divertida. Strange but fun.

Ted's new mantra....Something unexpected and wonderful will happen. I like that. Me gusta mucho.

Vida, ¿qué me vas a dar mañana?

Soy Lorena
12/10/06

Tutéame, por favor

"Tutéame." Doesn't that sound sexy? Here is a quote from Dos Mujeres en Praga: "Era la primera vez que le tuteaba y fue...como si la mujer se hubiera levantado de la silla, se hubiera acercado y le hubiera hecho una caricia." Híjole...wow. Well, desafortunadamente no tenemos nada así en inglés, a veces me parece que mi primer idioma es estéril, o no tan sexy como el español.

I tell my students that when they speak Spanish they have to know if they are speaking to a "tú" person or to an "usted" person. This is very important. One does not want to be viewed as a rude American or I should say Northamerican. When the taxi drivers address me as "usted," I feel respected, honored. When young people address me as "usted" I feel old. Qué chistoso. En España se usa "tú" con gente desconocida si somos de la misma clase o la misma profesión. Una vez fui a una conferencia en Madrid de profesores de español y me costó trabajo hablarles a los otros profesores que acababa de conocer con "tú." No lo hubiera hecho en México. Pero así era en España.

"Tú" es para los amigos íntimos y es curioso cuando la gente empieza con "usted" y después de un tiempo cambian a "tú." Así me pasó una vez y sentí la diferencia como si fuera una caricia.
(Qué rico cuando la relación desarrolla de un momento a otro).

So what's the equivalent in English? "You" is polite. We don't use "thou" anymore and "thou" has its own verb conjugation. Thou wast...sounds like we're living in the Bible. No, it just won't work. How do we get that intimacy in English? Do we add terms of endearment like honey, sweetheart, baby? That won't work for same sex friends unless....nevermind, that's another story.

Pues, sí, mi amigo. Yes, my friend. How often do we do that? Do you ever call your friend, my friend? Seems like something from another era, not very modern. But in Spanish it's cool, it works. Me alegro que el español haya seguido con las dos formas de hablar a la gente. Es lindo, es exacto, me gusta. Puedo guardar la distancia o no...it all depends on how I choose to address the other person.

Tú o Usted, maybe that is the question.

Soy Lorena
12/7/06

How about a good book?

So today I realized I'm not reading a book, I finished the last book or books I was reading, Dos Mujeres en Praga, and The World is Flat by Thomas Friedman (The Flat book I highly recommend) y ahora estoy sin libro, ay, ay ay, ¿qué voy a hacer? Traté de leer el libro por ex-presidente Clinton, pero francamente no me interesaba tanto, ahí está en mi estante, esperando no sé qué........so, there are books I can read right here in the house, books I bought thinking I would be compelled to read them because they provide knowledge of current affairs, pero me doy cuenta que no quiero saber de la política actual o más bien de todo lo que no funciona en este país o lo que funciona mal. To be quite honest I'm sick of the bad stuff, I want to read about the good stuff that's happening in the world, and I know there is good stuff happening. We just don't hear about it. ¿Por qué no?

Hay gente en el mundo que no riñe con otra gente, hay gente que no mata a otra gente, hay gente que no roba a otra gente. There are people who save other people's lives, people who help other people out when they need it, people who give to those in need. ¿No es interesante saber de estas noticias buenas? Hay gente que no tienen accidentes, que llegan sanos y salvos a dondequieran llegar. Why don't we care about this news? What does it say about Humanity that we only read about the robberies, the murders, the accidents and the natural disasters? Why is conflict so fascinating? Simplemente pregunto, no tengo respuestas, pero sé que me siento mucho mejor cuando no estoy pensando en todo lo malo del mundo. I guess what I'm saying is I can choose to see the good stuff and if I focus on more good stuff, maybe more good stuff will happen......the law of attraction. What do I want to bring into my life? ¿Qué quiero tener en mi vida? I want joy and love and beauty and friendship and connection with the Universe around me y palabras sabias que saben diferenciar entre el bueno y el malo y cosas por el estilo y música y honestidad y la luz de la luna que siempre me da tanto amor y la fuerza del sol. ¿Es mucho? Do I ask for too much? I'm not asking for the moon....oh, yes, actually, I am asking for the moon, but that's okay because I already have the moon, sí, la luna es mía y tuya y tuya y tuya........ad infinitum.

Et voila, there you have it, my ramblings for today. So, what book should I read that will give me all the good stuff I long for? Any ideas? Anyone? I'm open to suggestions.

I read some poetry this morning, but now the book has disappeared. Walt Whitman, Emily Dickenson, Robert Bly..................hmmmmmm. Silvio Rodriguez.

Soy Lorena.
12/6/06

Sand underneath my fingernails

El amanecer en la playa de mi tierra, I walk on the beach, stop to stretch and do some yoga, el poder de las olas y el cielo me llenan de paz, the sand sticks to my skin and gets under my fingernails and I welcome this little bit of nature. I am here only a moment, un momento nada más, un momento aquí en la playa, un momento en mi tierra natal, un momento con mis amigos, un momento para celebrar mi cumpleaños, un momento con mi papá que no me conoce, un momento que cambia a otro momento y pronto ya no estoy aquí, no estoy aquí en mi tierra natal, no estoy aquí en la playa viendo el sol amanecer, no estoy aquí con mis amigos celebrando la Vida, no estoy en mi tierra natal y en otro momento no estoy aquí en la Tierra...no estoy, no estoy, NO ESTOY; me pregunto ¿dónde estaré? en aquel momento.

Well, I didn't mean to get so heavy so early in the morning. Me parece que el pasado y el presente se chocan cuando viajo a mi tierra natal, tantas memorias, tanto tiempo, tantos cambios...but we must accept what is, isn't that right? What choice do we have anyway? What is, is, whether we like it or not, whether we accept it or not, each moment moves into the next moment and the next and the next and it's all pretty miraculous when you think about it, but maybe we shouldn't think too much about it, just live it, just live each moment the best we can, that's all we can do now isn't it? Oh, god, here I go again...I am so grateful for each and every moment Life has given me and keeps on giving me, the sunrises, the sunsets, the sand in my fingernails, las personas en mi vida que me mandan felicidades desde lejos para mi cumpleaños, este cumpleaños tan.........ummmmm.....¿importante? ¿grande? okay, tan más de medio siglo, otra década que pasó rápido, pero si vivo los momentos como si fueran largísimos, entonces el tiempo ya no existe....o existe de otra forma. Por ejemplo:

This has been the longest Fall I have ever experienced in my life because I have been so present, really present feeling every day, every sunrise, every sunset, every moonrise, every starry night, every cloudy night, every rainy day, breathing every breath of air to the fullest. It makes a difference, it really does, and I refuse to be sad, I refuse to let sadness or regret get into my body. My father is dying, but he is dying with a powerful life still in him, if that's possible. He is still stuck in a body that doesn't work for him anymore with a mind that is not functioning, but his heart is beating and strong too. He can't move but his heart is beating, beating, beating and he doesn't want to be here, I know, but Life won't let him leave just yet. Is this sad? Es triste para mí verlo así, pero tengo que aceptar lo que la Vida le da. No tengo alternativa. I can wish for things to be different, but what good does that do? Life is what it is even if we don't understand it. I am grateful for the care he receives, for the people around him who somehow see him for who he really is, not the demented persona he seems to be at times. He has his good days and his bad days. I try to look beyond all that. I know he loved me. He was a good father and I felt safe with him. These final moments are not real in a way, they do not reflect the person he really is, his true spirit. I try to hold on to his true spirit. That's all I can do...it's the best I can do. Daddy, I love you, I will always love you.

Soy Lorena
12/5/06

Crepúsculo

It is late afternoon in November and the sun is setting, las sombras de los árboles se estiran por la tierra y me tocan suavamente. I lean against this delicate tree near our brook and wonder about so many things. Está terminando el día, pronto vendrá la noche, primero el crepúsculo, first the dusk sneaks its way into my world and then de repente Night falls y empiezo mi vida de noche, subo la calefacción, prendo las luces, check my email, I slow down, search for warmth in the words of mis amigos o mi familia. A phone call from my daughter, a hug from Teddy and life moves on in its never-ending circle.

¿Adónde van los días? Parecen derretirse en la nada, se va el sol o la Tierra se da la vuelta más bien, y la noche permanece un buen rato. The yin and yang of this Universe is ever-present, seems to be carrying me along with it and I do what I think I must, waking up to the day and sleeping through the night. Dusk is the hardest part for me, Night falls, yes, it's not kidding, it's not subtle, I turn around and everything is black, yet the sunrise creeps slowly....or so it seems, and is anything what it seems? Hay que aceptar todo como es. Me encanta el verano con sus días largos, pero tengo que aceptar el otoño con sus días cortitos y sus noches de repente, you cannot linger this time of year, savor the day while it is here, enjoy its quick afternoon light and let it soothe you while it can, for the night will envelope you with its oscuridad total and it will be earlier than you think, but still you must fill your time before going to bed.

Have you ever awakened at two or three o'clock in the morning and looked out at the stars? They are three times brighter than normal and the sky looks magical. Parece un sueño y son diamantes suspendidos en el cielo oscuro. Is it my imagination? Todos aquellos soles iluminando otros planetas girando en nuestro universo, o a lo mejor son las joyas de las diosas del cielo, los destellos, the way the ancient peoples thought about the heavens. Who knows? Does it matter really? Para mí, me da lo mismo.

So I dance in the morning and meditate at night and the earth carries me and keeps me circling in its whirling, swirling patterns.

Soy Lorena
11/30/06

A reprint of the last half

Unfortunately, there was a problem with the size of the font and I could not figure out how to get the font to enlarge...so I am reprinting the last half of today's blog.

Thank you for the people in my life who share with me their thoughts and dreams, thank you for my feelings, my hopes, my curiosity and my optimism, gracias por mi casa que me da amparo, gracias por mi ropa que me cubre and me protege del frío, gracias por la comida que me alimenta. Thank you for vegetables and salads and fruit and chocolate, thank you for water, for tea and coffee so satisfying at the right moment, gracias por la música que me sosiega, thank you for my piano that takes me to another level of existence with her beautiful singing voice, thank you for the earth that supports me and never lets me down, gracias por las cartas que me llegan de los países lejanos, thank you for parents and children and grandchildren and cousins and lovers and dreams and fantasies...and for all the abundance in the Universe which is infinite.
GRACIAS, GRACIAS, GRACIAS, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.

Gracias (exclamation point)

Gracias por el sol aunque no lo veo hoy, gracias por la luna, aunque está escondida, gracias por el aire fresco que respiro en la mañana, thank you for the sky, the clouds, the trees that smile upon me with bare branches, gracias por mis pies que corren por el laberinto, gracias por mis músculos tan fuertes que me llevan dónde quiero ir, thank you for my beating heart that sends its energy throughout my body, thank you for the colors of the earth, the varied shades of green, los rojos y azules, las hojas anaranjadas ya acabadas, thank you for the beauty my eyes receive when I look upon you, earth, gracias por el arroyo que corre con una urgencia de llegar lejos...lejos...lejos.

Thank you for the people in my life who share with me their thoughts and dreams, thank you for my feelings, my hopes, my curiosity and my optimism, gracias por mi casa que me da amparo, gracias por mi ropa que me cubre y me protege del frío, gracias por la comida que me alimenta, thank you for vegetables and salads and fruit and chocolate, thank you for water, for tea and for coffee so satisfying at the right moment, gracias por la música que me sosiega, thank you for my piano that takes me to another level of existence with her beautiful singing voice, thank you for the earth that supports me and never lets me down, gracias por las cartas que me llegan de los países lejanos, thank you for parents and children and grandchildren and cousins and lovers and dreams and fantasies.....and for all the abundance in the Universe which is infinite. GRACIAS, GRACIAS, GRACIAS, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.

Did I leave out anything? I'm sure there's more.....what are you grateful for?

Soy Lorena
11/29/06

Luna, luna...where are you?

The new moon showed itself a few days ago, bulging with life and brilliance, but now the cloud cover is thick and I miss her, mi luna tan bella que me trae amor y recuerdos. Here is the full moon in San Miguel de Allende, this past summer, when we celebrated her arrival. Parece tan lejos, la luna, pero aquí está dentro de nosotros. Hard to believe she is inside each one of us. Close your eyes and you can feel her soft reflection soothing our hurts. The moon is moody as some people can attest because of their sensitivity to her changes. Para mí, la luna es puro amor y compasión. Te saludo, luna, te mando mi cariño y muchos besos y abrazos aunque no te vea hoy.....siempre te recuerdo.....siempre.

La luna en la Argentina está de cabeza. Sí, es cierto. Imagine that. So it's true that the southern hemisphere is upside down. I have it on good authority, only the catch is, the people who live there think we are upside down, but they see the moon's face the other way around. Who is right? It's a matter of point of view, punto de vista, depende de dónde la miras. It's a metaphor for opinions, perceptions, thoughts, ideas. Everything depends on your point of view. Entonces, nada es ni bueno ni malo, solamente depende de tu punto de vista. Are we right because we live in the northern hemisphere? Are they wrong because they live in the southern hemisphere? How silly. Qué ridículo. Tu puedes creer lo que quieras y no me hace daño a mí, ¿verdad que sí? Son tus acciones que cuentan, no tus creencias. ¿Qué opinas tú? Vamos a empezar un diálogo un día de estos.

I was thinking yesterday how everything seems to go in a circle...we wake up, start our day, we work, we run around, it gets dark, we go to sleep and the day begins again, the earth spinning and circling around the sun, the solar system spinning and moving through space. ¿Por eso estoy mareada? Todo se repite, everything is repeated, the day, the night, the seasons, and though we do the same things over and over, nothing is exactly the same. Todo cambia...ah, hay una canción sobre este tema. Qué maravilla de mundo es este. ¿Cómo puede uno abrurrirse? Imposible.

It all comes back to experiencing the moment, to being present, here and now. It is the same and it is not the same.

Enjoy your moments for they are unique.

Tus momentos son singulares.

Soy Lorena
11/28/06

Dos Mujeres en Praga

"Estamos condenados, en efecto, a tropezar con aquello de lo que huimos." Dos Mujeres en Praga, por Juan José Millás.

I'm reading this book now in Spanish, it's a strange story but very compelling. Why is this quote so true? Think about it, what you focus on is what you get. If you dwell on your fears, then they come to you because in a way you are calling them. Prefiero creer en la magia que existe cuando pienso en cosas buenas...como estas piedras, las junté, las arreglé pero no tenían forma bonita hasta que encontré las últimas dos piedras. La piedra más alta no estaba cerca, la había encontrado lejos en la entrada de la casa. Me llamó esta piedra y la recogí y la llevé cerca del jardín sin saber lo que iba a hacer con ella. Se quedó unos días esperándome creo, y cuando construía esta escultura tratando de hacer algo interesante, puse la penúltima piedra y en seguida supe que la piedra que había llevado unos días antes quería estar allá. And look how beautiful this rock sculpture is, how magical, how harmonious. For me this is a kind of meditation, Nature's beauty, I can just sit and stare at it and become peaceful and complete. I love its shapes, its lights and shadows, its majesty. Mírame, dice. Soy bella.

So what about two women in Prague? What about me in Massachusetts? Or you in wherever you are? To contemplate beauty and peace will bring beauty and peace into your life. Just think what we could accomplish if we all did that. If you give love you will receive love. No, this is not corny, (o cursi) it's simply true. Even if you don't believe it.......try it and watch what happens.

Soy Lorena
11/26/06

Where does Time exist?

I keep reading here and there that we create time, that there is no time in the Universe, that it is an invention of Man, del Hombre, entonces, ¿Dónde, exactamente, existe el tiempo? ¿En mi cabeza? Sé que no sé dónde existe el ciberespacio. Prendo mi computadora y allí está. La apago y se va.......pero ¿adónde? Se me hace que el ciberespacio es infinito. I get the feeling that cyberspace is infinite, like the Universe. How does that happen?

Have you watched the sun as it is setting? If I don't notice it, the sun seems to be just hanging out there in the sky for a long time, but If I focus my attention on it, wow, it's moving and fast, too. Me encanta mirar la puesta del sol sobre el mar. I love the way it "sinks" into the ocean.

So, where is yesterday? Where is tomorrow? ¿Dónde está el Ahora? Se dice que nada más tenemos este momento. Be in the present moment......is it right here wherever you are? Is my present moment the same as your present moment? What about our opinions and experiences? How do they shape what we see and feel in each present moment? Se puede volver loco pensando en estas preguntas. A lo mejor no hay respuestas. Pero me doy cuenta que si me pongo a contemplar estas preguntas llego a saber un poco, bueno, un poquito más de mí y del Universo dónde vivo. Por lo menos dejo de pensar en tonterías, o en el pasado, o en cosas que no me sirven para nada. The Power of Now por Eckhart Tolle dice "Accept what is. The moment that judgment stops through acceptance of what is you are free of the mind."
Maybe Time exists only in the mind. If that's true, then there is a way to be free of it. At this point in time, I'm not sure how to do that......oh, well, maybe next time I'll figure it out. :)

I think Spanish is a little more exact when it comes to using the word "time." We say, "What time is it? they say "¿Qué hora es?" What's the hour? We say "time and time again." They say "Una y otra vez." "Lots of times.......muchas veces." But we agree on this: "I don't have time. No tengo tiempo." Pero, de verdad, ¿tenemos tiempo o no tenemos tiempo? Do we have Time or does Time have us? Are we merely slaves to Time? Why are we all rushing around these days when our parents' generation "took their time?" How did all these machines to help us live better and easier lives find us with less time to do the fun things we want to do? Well, that's another story for another day.

Have a good time with your day. Que lo pases bien.

Soy Lorena
11/25/06

La Amistad

La amistad es para mí algo muy importante porque soy hija única. No conozco lo que es tener hermanos, y aunque he tenido cuñados, no es lo mismo.

Friendship, when it is deep and caring can be the most wonderful thing because along with the friendship goes a kind of love, different from Romantic love or love for your children or parents even. Friendship is chosen, escogida y a veces no sabemos por qué brota la amistad con esta persona pero no con aquella.

Recently, I met in person a woman with whom I have been emailing for five years. She came to visit from a faraway place and because we had been writing for so long and kind of knew each other's position on a number of things, we knew we would get along...but I don't think we knew to what extent we would connect. La verdad, sentí que la conociera toda la vida. We just clicked. We had the best time together, we chatted, we laughed, we ran around the city seeing everything as if for the first time. It was hard to say good-by, but I know that now I have a friend for life.

Sometimes a friend's words can do so much. Me llegaron unas palabras lindas de otro amigo hace poco y me inspiraron tanto sus palabras que compuse una canción con ellas. Me tocaron sus palabras profundamente, me hicieron llorar y me hicieron dar las gracias por esta amistad tan bella en mi vida.

So, yes, well, gratitude is one thing I'm feeling a lot of these days, gratitude for these friendships, gratitude for this life, gratitude for my children and all of the abundance that the Universe has given me....and especially GRATITUDE for my parents....finally, por fin.

Isn't it appropriate this time of year when tomorrow is THANKSGIVING?

I wish everyone good friendships and may Gratitude be with you always.

Soy Lorena
11/22/06

¿Cómo amaneciste?

In English we say, "How did you sleep?" En castellano se dice "¿Cómo amaneciste?" o How did you wake up? But since el amanecer is the dawn, I think of this phrase as literally How did you dawn? Think about it. How did you sleep? What's the real answer to that question? How did I do something....hmmm, how did I sleep? Well, I put on my pajamas, lay down on my bed, closed my eyes and the next thing I knew it was morning. Isn't that how I sleep?

On the other hand, How did I dawn, or How did I wake up? Lista para enfrentar el día...
o descansada, o con ganas de levantarme a salir para hacer los ejercicios, o deseando una taza de té o mil y un sentimientos. We say the day dawns, but maybe we can dawn as well and perhaps that's a better way to greet the new day. How did you dawn? I like that.

This morning was the coldest morning so far this season, 24 degrees F. o -4 Centigrados. Había escarcha por todos lados afuera. La foto que saqué es del laberinto con escarcha, pero tal vez no se note mucho en la foto. Pero sí, el pasto no está verde, sino blanco. Me puse mi gorro, los guantes y una chamarra bien caliente y anduve un buen rato inhalando el aire escarchado y fresco.

Cada día hay algo distinto, una sorpresa del Universo, cada momento es distino.

Billie Jean King (the tennis champion) once said that the ball never crosses the net the same way twice.

Nothing every happens the same way twice. And for me, that's what makes life interesting.

Soy Lorena
11/21/06

This is not a test

If you fail a test, maybe there's a chance to take it over. This is your life and it is NOT a test. If you fail, there is no chance to take it over.
What does it mean to fail?
I don't think making mistakes means you fail, creo que cuando haces errores y no aprendes de tus errores, entonces eso es un fracaso.

Does the Universe test us? ¿Parece que el Universo nos da pruebas o problemas para resolver? Nadie nos dijo que la vida será fácil.

¿Qué te pasa cuando la Vida no te hace la vida fácil? ¿Cómo te comportas? ¿Cómo reaccionas?

How do you deal with a government worker on the telephone who either doesn't answer your questions, tells you the computer is down, or gives you a different answer than the other government worker last week?
How do you keep your sanity in the midst of confusion?
How do you resolve the problem?

¿Cómo sigues adelante con el peso de los problemas sin resolver?

En la universidad tenía yo un profesor que siempre decía cuando ya terminaba la clase, "adelante."

Bueno, digo ahora adelante, adelante, ADELANTE, mis amigos. Esto no es una prueba, es tu vida....................que sigas adelante--

Or do something creative.

Soy Lorena
11/20/06

Sunday

Domingo, a day of rest, but I am creating again, a new song is bursting forth...

Habló mi Musa y aproveché la hora, se trata del agradecimiento de nuestros padres, lo que nos han dado y lo que hacemos en su honor.

A ver como sale.........

Que descansen este día.

Until next time.

Soy Lorena.
11/19/06

Solitude, la soledad

Leaves fell on the skylight, the rain held them there.
The sun came out and they blew away.
But here is their moment....as if dancing in air.
Nature's art....

Hojas en la claraboya, bailando
y pegadas por la lluvia.
Duraron un rato no más, para que les sacara una foto.

Hoy estoy sola, me desperté sola, pasé el día sola, comí sola, pasé la aspiradora sola, limpié la cocina sola, toqué el piano sola, canté sola, fui a ver el arroyo sola, miré el sol cambiar su luz sola, vi la oscuridad empezar a llegar sola, escuché lus ruidos de la casa sola, pinté el laberinto sola, y al final de cuentas me doy cuenta que no quiero vivir sola. Un día sola es aguantable, pero más días solas, sé que no los quiero.

The leaves are not lonely, they are piled on top of each other, they fall together one by one or in clumps, they stick to each other, they decompose back into earth again...together. The trees are not lonely, they live side by side, they grow, their branches touch, their leaves mix together as they fall.

Did I say I was lonely? No, the day is quiet, I am alone. I like to be alone sometimes. I am good company for myself.

Enjoy yourself. Enjoy your solitude. Enjoy others too. This universe has many opposites. They can be fun.

Hasta pronto.

Soy Lorena.
11/18/06

El Mundo Cambia

The world is changing, time has speeded up, "el tiempo corre como agua entre las manos"
Today I took the commuter train into Boston and when I went to get on the subway, (metro) suddenly I thought I was in Europe. I was confronted by very sophisticated-looking machines, ya no había gente vendiendo las fichas y me tocaba dar el dinero a la máquina, apretar la pantalla, pero no sabía dónde empezar. At the next machine was a young pregnant woman. I turned to her and said, "I like people. I don't know how to do this." She asked me what I wanted to do and I told her buy two "tokens" que ya no son fichas sino boletos. Ella empezó a apretar la pantalla de su lado y me dijo que fuera allá y meter el dinero. What a nice person, I thought. After I got my ticket and my change, I turned to her and asked, "¿Hablas español?"
"Sí," me dijo.
"Ay, hubiéramos hablado en español," le dije. She smiled.

I learned something from this encounter. The world may be changing but it is still full of good people, walking angels I'd like to call them. When I need help, the Universe provides me with exactly what I need. I wished this young woman luck with her future motherhood...but not out loud. I was too shy to do that. Sí, soy tímida a veces. Como ya dije, el tiempo pasa rápido, y este encuentro no duró más que unos minutos. Se fue ella, me fui yo......y seguimos nuestras vidas.

My main objective for the day was to see my granson play his last football game of the season. He's a Freshman, but they take the game seriously. Actually, it's more than just a game. It's teamwork, being part of a group, learning how to cooperate, be a community, apoyar el uno al otro, vivir como una entidad, aprender trabajar juntos y mucho más. Su equipo ganó, jugaron muy bien, y lo mejor fue que ganaron a su rival. He was flying high. We went to dinner, my daughter, Alex and me. He's still sweet, todavía es dulce. Lo quiero mucho.

Life is good.

How to find Authentic Happiness, try this.

Soy Lorena.
11/17/06

Somos humanos

¿Qué quiere decir, realmente ser un ser humano? Un ser humano tiene compasión por otro ser humano porque los dos sabemos lo que el otro siente, ¿sí o no?
Entonces, ¿por qué hay asesinos? ¿Por qué hay guerras? ¿Por qué hay tortura en este mundo?

¿Somos humanos o somos inhumanos? Tal vez estas preguntas no tienen respuestas.

I think many things can be tied to the Seven Deadly Sins, los siete pecados capitales,

ávaro (greed), lujuria (lust), pereza (sloth), glotonería (gluttony), arrogancia o altivez (pride),
envidia (envy), ira (anger)

If you allow these so-called Sins to overtake you, then you can be led to commit inhuman acts.
¿No es cierto? Does robbery and murder stem from greed? ¿Does rape come from lust?
¿Does anger lead to torture during war conditions? I only ask.

Simplemente pregunto.

I don't want to leave you with these heavy themes, afterall, there is still happiness amid misery, hope amid desperation...somos humanos, ¿verdad? SERES HUMANOS. Tenemos la capcidad de resolver problemas, sanar los malos pensamientos, crear un mundo mejor.

I try to do my best....my best can only start with me....your best begins with you.

Suerte...hasta pronto.

Soy Lorena
11/16/06

My iPod nano

Yes, yes, I know happiness does not come from owning material things. When it comes to electronic gadgets I usually wait and wait before I purchase and then don't purchase. But this time I waited and waited and then decided to purchase an ipod. By the time I got to the store, the nano had arrived. Well......to be perfectly honest my ipod nano has made me very happy.
¿De verdad? No puede ser...qué ridículo.(exclamation point here) Pero, la verdad o "la neta" como dicen en México, no es la cosa electronica que trae felicidad, sino la música que da. Ahora tengo toda mi música preferida en un solo lugar y fácil de escuchar. And that's what I experience as happiness. To put on my head phones, run outside, jog, skip, dance to David Lanz' Skylight Firedance, puro piano con una energía emocionante que me motiva a moverme el cuerpo.
Or listen to the flutes of the Andes, or sing along with the trova singers, Fernando Delgadillo y más, o escuchar a Mayahuel, el conjunto de San Miguel de Allende, ay, qué rico.........

Final note for today. Happiness comes from within and from one's perspective or point of view, punto de vista. It's not about the THING, it's about how I choose to experience the THING. I was happy before I got my ipod nano. I just feel that my happiness is a little bit enhanced because of my ipod nano. (ha ha) Does this make any sense at all?

Hasta mañana.

Soy Lorena.
11/15/06

La Música

La música me corre por las venas. Tengo ganas de componer otra canción
pero no tengo la letra. I need the lyrics to create a song. Once I have the words
the music flows like a waterfall, una cascada, and quickly
I go to the piano and let it happen, watch it happen.

Mi Musa ha estado un poco callado últimamente, pero hay que tener paciencia; Patience is a Virtue.

This morning I went outside for my morning exercise.
It was drizzling, lloviznando, había neblina, pero bailé
de todos modos en la lluvia....dancing in the rain, the stream
was rushing ahead full force and filling up our occasional pond.
No ducks, no frogs to hear, the trees are bare now, but this
is the first Fall I have been so present, aware of each day,
truly experiencing this season as much as I experience summer.
Wow. Being in the moment is a really wonderfull place to be.
El momento, este momento y este, y este y este...........etc. La verdad,
es profundo, ¿cuándo tenemos el cuerpo y la mente en el mismo lugar al
mismo tiempo? No es fácil.
This morning I dreamed I was going skiing with people who ski a lot.
I have never been skiing. I saw this dream as a reflection of the rehearsal
I had last night with experienced singers, while I am a novice in this area.
Okay, so it's time to stretch. It's all about one's experience and training. They
have had training...I have not, well, just a little. I have started singing lessons
at this stage in my life and it's really quite exciting. ¡Qué emoción! Me encanta
aprender algo nuevo.
Hay que aprender cosas nuevas. Es lindo, te llena de vida.

Here's to learning something new. ;)
Chau.

Soy Lorena
11/14/06

"The Happiness Hypothesis"

Este libro escrito por Jonathan Haidt se llama "The Happiness Hypothesis, finding modern Truth in Ancient Wisdom" Aquí está su sitio en el web: http://www.happinesshypothesis.com/

Me pongo feliz cuando________________________________. Fill in the blank.

I get happy when____________________________________. Llena el espacio.
I get happy when:
I wake up each morning and it's a new day, a new beginning, and I don't know what will happen.
I run outside to greet the sun or the rain or the warmth or the cold or the fog.
I see the moon and know that she is mine...and yours too.
I receive an email from a friend in a faraway place. Sé que somos unidos, parte de un entero enorme, sin fin.
I nourish my body with my liquid breakfast, banana, blueberries, almond milk, protein, vitamins, minerals, flax oil, mmmmmmmmmmmm....
Ted and I hug and smile and look deep into each other's eyes.
I feel my body waking up, my muscles stretching into action.
Acepto a mí misma, sabiendo que soy perfecta.
Dejo que el mundo haga lo que tiene que hacer, sin pensar que todo va mal.
Tengo todo listo para dar mis clases.
I know that all my needs are met and there is no need to worry.
I realize that NOW is all we have and our days on this earth are short.

When do you get happy? ¿Cuándo te toca la Felicidad?

Soy Lorena
11/13/06

Epitafio para un poeta

Un poema por Octavio Paz, el poeta mexicano.

Quiso cantar, cantar
para olvidar
su vida verdadera de mentiras
y recordar
su mentirosa vida de verdades.

Me encanta este poema. I love this poem. I'd like to try
to put it into English....let's see.

He wanted to sing, to sing
in order to forget
his real life of lies
and remember his lying life of truths.

Someone tell me if the English says it the way
Paz meant it.

Anyway, it rained today, a large part of the day and there was flooding
as we drove into Boston to see a play.
I think of movies as an escape, but of theatre as being slapped in the face with the real world.
Theatre doesn't let you off the hook, el Teatro te dice Mírame, mírate a ti, mira la vida, aprende de tus errores, enfrenta la Verdad...Face the Truth with a Capital T.

The play was Rabbit Hole. I highly recommend it, the acting was superb, the message deep and tragic...we cried. For me it is so satisfying to experience great theatre. One of my strengths is Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence. Encontré esto porque tomé la prueba de la Felicidad, the Happiness test. I'll have to look up the website and post it here.

La Felicidad....¿Por qué se dice "soy feliz?" Were you happy today? Did Happiness touch your life, o sea, te diste cuenta que la Felicidad te tocaba? Aunque pasan cosas tristes, todavía existe la felicidad.

Les mando mucha felicidad, I wish you much happiness.

Soy Lorena
11/12/06

Mis hojas de noviembre--November pages

It's November....isn't it? noviembre y casi todas las hojas se han caído, but my "leaves" keep coming, pages of thoughts that fill my head and fall into the present moment. Esta mañana me puse a rastrillar las hojas que tapaban el laberinto. The sun was rising, the ground was still dew covered and the faint white lines of my hand-painted labyrinth were still hanging onto the wet grass. Miré arriba y vi la luna...the half bulging moon in its waning phase. It was a beautiful moment and I felt a deep appreciation for being alive. Corrí, salté, bailé taking in the fresh air of the morning and the hawk flew overhead, nuestro halcón que vive en este vecindario, elegante, majestuoso...enemy of the small birds around here and the chipmunks. The chipmunks, by the way, have been tucking themselves away more often than usual. "Rocky", the chipmunk I consider my pet, who likes to take peanuts from my hand, has been especially reticent to show himself lately. I think perhaps these creatures begin to slow down as the fall season changes into winter....ojalá que pudiéramos hacer lo mismo, pero nuestra vida sigue su ritmo frenético durante todo el año. Mis días libres son para mí lo mejor para desestresarme, (si existe esta palabra), to "destress", slow down, take it easy, breathe, send out gratitude to the Universe, take in all the goodness and beauty the Universe has to give....remember, the Universe is endless, sin fin.
At some point I want to talk about "voluntary activities" and the impact they have on us. Not volunteer activities, that's something else. Lo que uno hace simplemente por gusto. What you do in your spare time...when you have spare time....what moves you, what calls out to you, what gives you life.

Saludos...until next time.

Soy Lorena
11/11/06

Day one, Spanish and English

Prefiero llamarme tejedora, tejedora de ideas o pensamientos. As I was thinking about creating a blog, I was wondering what the theme should be…el tema, y en seguida quería que este blog mío fuera bilingüe, o sea, en castellano y en inglés, así mi mundo sería más grande. The world opens up when there is more than one language.

We were in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, this summer and I was in two worlds at once. There was the “gringo” world, retired Americans, some richer than us, people I would not have the opportunity to hang with in my own country, but there, I was accepted. Then there were the Mexicans, the local people with whom I could also relate because I spoke their language and in my other life, mi otra vida, I had been married to one. It was cool.

Pero, regresando al tema, getting back to what I want to write about, HAPPINESS o FELICIDAD…what is happiness? How do we attain it? Jonathan Haidt wrote a book called The Happiness Theory, and he says we are all born with a “set point” for happiness, o sea, uno nace con su capacidad de sentir felicidad ya fija y las circunstancias no necesariamente cambian eso. Once an optimist, always an optimist? I am optimistic and have always been that way, even though my life was filled with unhappy events for many years….well, not exactly unhappy events, but rather more like not being accepted for who I was, being criticized for my thoughts or beliefs, but…let’s not go there. No vayamos allá. No hay que pensar en el pasado, un pasado ya muy pasado.

¿Merecemos la felicidad? Don Miguel Ruiz dice que estamos aquí (en la Tierra) para disfrutar de la vida. We are here to enjoy life and if we are impeccable with our word, don’t take things personally, don’t make assumtions and always do our best, we will be happy. Sounds easy, doesn’t it? I’ve been working on living these four agreements of Don Miguel, and it’s not easy. The trick is to increase your awareness of your actions and words, but life happens fast sometimes, bueno, casi siempre pasa rápido y ya cuando me doy cuenta de lo que he dicho, pues, ya es tarde, ya lo dije. Oops! Well, next time I’ll be more careful, but it’s a slow process, don’t kid yourself. And I’ve learned that you can’t separate the agreements, all four are connected. You can’t be good at one, but not good at another. If you make an assumption, you then tend to say something based on that assumption which turns out not to be impeccable and you take it personally, and then of course you’re not doing your best. I’ve seen this happen in myself. El camino a la Ilustración (Enlightenment) es largo y lleno de impedimentos, ¿no es cierto? Pero seguimos, paso a paso, step by step, sometimes baby steps.

So, I’d love to have a dialog about happiness, en castellano o en inglés, o en los dos idiomas. Write and tell me your thoughts.

Soy Lorena.
11/11/06