Mi Padre

Mi padre era un hombre de pocas palabras, pero era fuerte, fiable, responsable y me quería mucho.
I was safe with my father, I knew he would always take care of me. He was smart too. He knew how to build radios and fix things. He knew about math and the weather and the stars and planets because he loved astronomy. He had a telescope and used to show me all the cool things that were happening up in the night sky.

Le encantaba la magia y sabía hacer muchos juegos como desaparecer cosas o hacerlas aparecer de la nada. Cuando yo era chica, mi papá sabía poner huevos...de veras. Les decia a mis amigos, "My daddy knows how to lay an egg." Tenía tanta confianza en lo que decía yo que creo que mis amigos me creían.

He would take me to see professional magicians who performed in auditoriums in front of a live audience. Once I remember we went to see a hypnotist do a show. He hypnotized two or three people and told them they couldn't lift up a folding chair. They tried and tried and couldn't lift the chair. Then the hypnotist asked me to come up on stage and had me lift the folding chair. I remember the strange looks the hypnotized people on stage gave me, like they couldn't understand how such a little girl could lift that chair. I must have been eight or nine at the time.

Mi papá murió el domingo, el 25 de febrero en una clinica de reposo. He died in a nursing home at the age of 88. I last saw him in December. His mind wasn't the same and he had arthritis in his right hand so bad that it was curled up, painful and basically useless. I don't want to remember him like that. I want to remember him as the strong, caring, dependable father that he was to me. It is hard to lose him, but I know he was not happy being in a body that was no longer serving him. I know he must be happier now. He has siblings on the other side who have been waiting for him, I'm sure. I mourn for him, but it is my loss. I sense he is telling me to lighten up because he has lightened up. He is free now. I need to understand that he is not really "gone" but he is here in my heart. He will always be in my heart and his spirit lives on in my children, (his granddaughters) and my grandson, (his great-grandson).

These are things that never die.

"I wish you a beautiful spiritual journey."

"I love you, Daddy, I don't think I said that enough when you were alive."

Soy Lorena
2/27/07